Grief

Sometimes even all the words in the world cant describe your feeling,
The stab you feel in your insides when you lose your loved one,
The feeling of your body being suddenly pulled and swallowed underground,
The helplessness of your tongue,
The blankness in your mind which blocks you from processing,
The cluelessness of the next steps,
The reminder of it all each and every day,
Days have passed, months and years will too,
They say time heals, will need to wait to validate that,
For now the grief is like the ocean,
Endless….

The Non pluviophile

I bet 80% of you already dislike me after reading this title!

But stay a while and read it through, will you?……….please?!

So yes I kind of dislike the rains……no, I didnt say ‘hate’, I said ‘dislike’, but not ‘hate’ coz thats too harsh…..for example…I ‘hate’ terrorism and I ‘dislike’ the rain. So theres a huge difference.

Now that thats clear, coming back……I think I have never really been a big fan of it…even from childhood. I often get told ‘How are you even a mallu (keralite/malayalee) if you dont like the rains?!’ I understand…but maybe all the upbringing in the North has made me like this. I actually love the summers…the sunlight,the brightness,the shine,the light…as opposed to the wet and dark. And I recently googled out that there is a term for such ppl too..Heliophiles😊😊! I know it sounds a lil lame…but yes it does exist.

But hey I do know there are millions who love the monsoons….esp in those places that see very less rainfall in a year…and ofcourse the farmers who actually worship rain…not to forget those affected by drought and heatstrokes.

Surely you may have said in your mind to me the famous proverb ‘you dont know the value of your eyes unless you become blind’! But no its not that and my sincere respect to the raingods for their grace on usπŸ™. I really do mean it.

My post should actually get over here because I dont have a lot more to say on the rains…but then I dont think I am done. There is just one more thing I want to share with you…which are actually nothing but some life lessons I have learnt as a result of all this –

1.Not everybody is the same-You may be from the same region and speak the same language, but your preferences could be completely different from another’s. So dont judge! To each their own 😊

2.Your hard phase is temporary-Summer is followed by Monsoon which is again followed by Summer….Your sad/hard/difficult phase will come and go.Nothing is permanent…not your life and certainly not your situation!Change is the only thing constant in this world😊

3.A part of someone you dont like should not prejudice you to dislike the whole person– I may not like the rains but I am a beach lover (obvious from my earlier posts), but both revolve around the same element- water. You may meet a lot of ppl in life whom you disagree with on certain stuff, but then again dont assume things based on some topics or discussions!

4.There are a lot of things we dont know about others and their situations, so respect and try to understand one another. I may have no idea what the farmers and their families go through with even a single day delay of the monsoons.The growing number of farmer suicides should hurt you,me and everybody. Lets not be irresponsible and indifferent towards those in pain and difficulty.

5.You may be thinking that this post actually has nothing to do much with the rains and that brings me to the last life lesson I have learnt –Dont judge a book by its cover and dont judge people by how they look or seem to appear.

Love n luck!😊😊

Tweet to me @NewGirlNewCity

Seeking Divine intervention!

(Actually spent nearly 30 minutes staring at the title of this post , not knowing where or how to start….)

Is the title really that lame? Does it really sound stupid to actually sit n wait for divine intervention in one’s life?! I dont know really …but what I do know from past experiences is that it does work……well atleast eventually…so for me its kinda tried and tested!

And No I am not really that religious and like a lot of other people I shamelessly seem to remember God’s existence only and only when confronted with fear, doubt or grief. And for me to name this post with That title is taking the shamelessness to a whole different level! 

But I do believe in ‘karma‘….but the whole ‘hanging in there‘ part is tough.Days when I think do I even have a purpose in this life? And then other days when I feel like just getting lost somewhere,Why do we even call ourselves free when there is actually really nothing ‘free‘ about this life?! Or atleast why does it seem so and why is it so difficult to cross that barrier n break free….? Yea…. so as you can see I do hit the ‘Writer’s block’ of my life quite often!

There is a nice meaningful dialogue in a Malayalam movie that I saw years back….and since then those lines have been etched in my memory.They are said by an old man in the movie.The lines translate to ‘Every event or hardship happening in our life currently may seem like a very big thing to us now but as the days go by…these past incidents become the different stories in the book of our life, Stories that we will think about, discuss and laugh about in the future’. So who knows perhaps there will even be a day when I will laugh about this very blog post!

I wish I knew the unknown….Till then let me be satisfied thinking, like the song goes…..’Are we all lost stars, trying to light up the dark?!’ …Are we??

Last Day of the year

There you arrive again, 
And once again I am left thinking the past!
How you passed away…sometimes quiet othertimes not,
A lot we expected…a lot unexpected happened,
A lot we assumed…a lot unpredictable occured,
New friends we made….few old hearts we broke,
Few of those dear passed away leaving a void,
But nonetheless no regrets,
All said n done…its tym to adieu u goodbye..
New hopes, new wishes, new year! 
Wishing u love, luck and joy,
-Not so New girl!

Happiness is …..

U know those ‘Happiness is …’ posts these days with those stick drawings of ppl…,i think it has suddenly become very popular coz its honest,simple and very adorably cute posts. So today on cing one of those…i was just wondering to myself what or rather when do i feel really very happy in my life?! So i came up with my own list…and no there are no drawings…i wud hav made some had i not got ‘D’ grade in art class in 5th standard after which i made a vow to never draw again πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

So coming bak to my list (Some of it is stupid but u wud understand it only from my perspective which u obviously cudnt coz u wud have to become me then πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚)

  • Happiness is lying wrapped in a cozy blanket as you prepare to sleep on a chilly nite n u dont need to wake up early next day.
  • Happiness is going for long walks with your bestie, chatting and laughing again n again on old jokes and life experiences.
  • Happiness is feeling that much awaited new book in your hands and getting prepared to start reading it with a cup of coffee.
  • Happiness is listening to your favourite song getting played from your random playlist just when there is exactly time enuf for one last song.
  • Happiness is bollywood dance.
  • Happiness is watching your mom laugh crazily at a joke u just cracked.
  • Happiness is getting window seat (nywher and everywher)
  • Happiness is wearing ur fav pyjama or nighty set to sleep.
  • Happiness is buying a much needed gift for sumone and watching them open it.
  • Happiness is getting to be the default deejay of whichever or whoseever car u sit in while going for a long ride.
  • Happiness is the sore after-feeling of a gud work out.
  • Happiness is having the full liberty to make decisions on your own (no matter hw stupid or nonsensical they may sound.
  • Happiness is spending hours on a quiet beach.
  • Happiness is watching ‘Ellen’
  • Happiness is watching cute dog videos (esp soldiers homecoming ones)
  • Happiness is talking baby language (kid talk) with elder brothers.
  • Happiness is reading your 10th std autograph/slam book.
  • Happiness is eating the following in no particular order whenever and wherever-
  1. vada-pav
  2. Omlette (no cheese)
  3. boondi raita
  4. Coffee-bite toffee
  5. ‘Aero’ chocolate
  6. Waffles (with maple syrup)
  7. Popcorn (salted)
  8. Buttermilk (spicy)
  9. Donuts (freshly made hot ones with no toppings)
  10. Anything that has PANEER in it
  11. Fish n chips
  12. Idli chutney with filter coffee
  13. Olives (salted)

Love,Luck n Joy

Tweet to me @NewGirlNewCity

Drive the blues away!

So I think I have shared a lot of my thoughts here….my favourite quotes n pics as well…so now I thought of introducing yet another set of my favourites…this tym its music…

I m a hardcore music lover like every Indian i guess…especially bollywood (yup i do hear a lot of english as well as regional stuff but i thot of concentrating just on bollywood songs in this post). So if you hav read atleast a few of my posts…u r sure to know that I am a noir lover…yup so here goes my favourite list of sad heartbreak bollywood songs…this ultimate list includes all my favourite numbers n they are forever there in my Dukhi playlist! I have also put up the youtube links for the songs so incase u havent heard them…u surely can now…rite away!

1.So my list is not exactly in the chronological order but i will try.So first up is ‘Ae Ajnabi’ from DilSe.The lyrics in this song is so beautiful especially if you are reaching out to a loved one with whom u hav no touch now or to sumone really far away from u both physically or emotionally! ARR just goes to prove that he is ace!

https://youtu.be/RNjBz0kdaJk 

2.Second up is ‘Tadap Tadap’ from Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam. The movie itself was a musical saga of the legendary Ismail Darbar…this song is about painful separation between 2 lovers. The stanzas are so good n meaningful that it will surely make one cry.

https://youtu.be/NV_XDwH606c

3.’Tanhayee’ from Dil Chahtha Hain…the movie was a cult movie.But this sad number is a killer…its all about loneliness as the song title aptly means.

https://youtu.be/ZkwaiIGoyT4

4.’Nahin Samne’ from Taal. Another brilliant musical saga by ARR.Hariharan nailed it vit his soothing vocals.

https://youtu.be/-8tojQ18w08

5.’Mathura Nagarpati’ – Raincoat.Not many ppl like this song but its one of my fav. Shuba Mudgal almost narrates a story in this iconic song.This is the kind of song tat gives me a chill down my spine.

https://youtu.be/VC0RcZ5kwkE

6.’Ya Rabba’ – Salaame-E-Ishq. Kailash Kher wrks his magic in this song…and the lyrics especially touches ur heart in a very special way if ur heart has ever been broken.

https://youtu.be/pMFl6R5OqT4

7.’Aaoge Jab Tum’ from Jab We Met.This song is almost similar to the one above.

https://youtu.be/WPwTPhFMm3k

8.’Tune Jo Na Kaha’- New York. Again this song doesnt come up in everyone’s playlist but it does in mine esp for the lyrics. Its about love which goes unexpressed.Also with this song the Mohit Chauhan era sets in.Plus this song serves as an excellent lullaby if u r sleepless.

https://youtu.be/uVTdmJIcjtQ

9.’Jag Soona Soona Lage’ – Om Shanti Om. Excellent beats for a sad song.Oh and with this song enters the Rahat Fateh Ali Khan era.😊

https://youtu.be/5VP-tau_XfU

10.’Lehrein’ – Aisha. This song was the only thing good about the movie and it is my official favourite sad song.Its about broken plans and broken dreams. With this music Amit Trivedi proved that he is no less to ARR.

https://youtu.be/WYDc1JQqduY

11.’Kun Faya Kun’ – Rockstar. Yup God is God and ARR proved that with this movie.This Sufi number is magical and it will truly help anyone and everyone who has any trouble in his life.Its talks about eternal trust and devotion to the almighty.

https://youtu.be/T94PHkuydcw

12.So my list is nearly ending here.’Tu Kuja’ from Highway.By now you know ARR is my favourite. But the credit for this song i think would go to Sunidhi Chauhan for her vocals.Great variation in the music and Sunidhi catches some insane high tones.This song is also about devotion to God…a song about being desperate and seeking immediate divine intervention.

https://youtu.be/_7oqN2WeRNM

13.List would be totally incomplete without PritamDa. ‘Kabira’ – Yeh Jawani Hain Diwani.Well this song wudnt entirely come in the sad category…but it does call out to someone who is leaving n hence is sad!

https://youtu.be/jHNNMj5bNQw

14.’Agar Tum Saath Ho’ – Tamasha. So among the recent ones this would be my ultimate fav.Alka Yagnik and Arijit would hav seemed like an odd pair but this song has proved that they are amazing n legendary.The end esp is killer with both the male n female voice intertwining. ARR- you rock Sir!

https://youtu.be/6SGRn9OHtFY

15.’Channa Mereya’ – Ae Dil Hain Mushkil.Never really thought this movie would make this list coz i hated the movie but this song….this song just maybe saves the film!The lyrics honestly cant get any better! Absolutely love it…Mere zikr ka zubaan pe swaad rakhna…!

https://youtu.be/z-diRlyLGzo

So tats my ‘heartbreak’ πŸ’” playlist…So drive away the blues with these awesome numbers.Tata!

Life as we know it

We come, we live and we go,
Its like a mechanical process.
When one goes another comes,
When one is bid farewell with painful tears and grief,
another bundle of joy erupts through a shortlived bittersweet pain.
What is constant in both is Pain…
There has to be an answer to this mystery of pain created by Him,
Maybe thats His way of reminding that its still His world and we are nothing but tenants in His house.
We think we have got it all sorted,Each one comes, grows, studies, works, marries, reproduces and then dies.
The choice and time of entering or exiting is not on us…
But what we have with us is what is in between
And He has given us That choice to do it anyway we like or wish.
Maybe there is no right or wrong way to live…Maybe we need to live the way we want to and when we meet a difficult point or a dead end….we improvise!

So Heres to us improvising in this short journey we know as ‘Life’!

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